Death vs Hopeless Life; Eliminate Your Fear

I know that heading of this is not as optimistic as I always write. But the fact is not everything in life is all the time optimistic or goes the way you want it to go.

There have been a few incidents in my life where I thought that death is the only option. I am a sensitive human and had a traumatic childhood.

Now when I think about it, the reasons why I thought Death is the only option:

  • I never spoke to anyone about how I feel.
  • I never had a friend to share my feelings with.
  • Was not capable of understanding my own emotions.
  • I thought my feelings are not valid.
  • Was living in a bubble that “life is fair”
  • I kept on making unpleasant scenarios in my mind
  • Never spoke to my parents about what was bothering me
  • Felt Like I was Burden/ liability on my family
  • Isolation

I wish at that time I spoke to someone about how I feel however I did not and that made me think it okay to choose Death. I tried to choose an easy way out every time I was unable to handle life, untill I realised how to handle deal with my emotions.

That’s the beauty of life. Life is never about “my way or Highway” like the famous songs lyrics. Life is more about living in the moment, making the best of it, being sane, even in the most insane times, making mistakes, finding yourself, creating yourself, failures, disappointments, heartbreaks and then recreating yourself just like the phoenix bird.

Over the years I found ways to handle stress, emotions and anxiety. It has always worked for me. Here’s is the secret

  1. Accept your emotions/feelings : It’s okay to feel what you are going through, your feelings are valid. Accepting your emotions simply means being aware of your emotions and accepting them for what they are right now, knowing that they won’t last.
  2. Have A Confidant : You must learn to trust and confide about your feelings. If you don’t have a friend/family as your confidant, write down how you feel. I used to write mails to myself. If you are not able to do it to a human, talk to you pet. It works the same way, once your feelings are out you will not only feel better but will also get clear picture of your situation.
  3. Stop Overthinking / Over-analysing: Sometimes it’s better to let go of the situation for that day. Sleep over it and come back to it the next day. At times we blow things out of proportion by going over them time and again in your mind.
  4. Forgive yourself and others : Make a list of all the positive things about yourself and your life. It might be hard to think of these things in the moment, especially when you are going through this emotional process. But still make it a habit to write down your strengths and positive things other people have said about you. Write down the name of the person who hurt you and then write “I forgive you”.
  5. Write Journal: Every day write down one thing you felt good about, something you did for someone, or something someone did for you. Come back to this when you feel blue.

The way you feel will not vanish by its own, you need to make efforts to come out of it. Try different ways and stick to the way that works the best for you.

Where to get help
*Your doctor
*Your local community health centre

-Apurva

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