If you have a new mom in your life, she is already dealing with a lot, let’s not add up to her stress. We often forget how tedious task it is to raise a child. Especially, if someone is a new mom. She is sleep deprived, dealing with all these new changes, adjusting with the new hormonal and physical changes in her.
Although all women should be given information about the physiological
process of recovery after birth and should be told that some health
problems are common, with advice to report any health concerns to their respective doctor’s.
Here are some pointers for you. This blog is dedicated to my sister, she became a mom today:
Don’t comment on her body
You don’t need to comment on her body or how her body may be changing. Telling a new mom, “You’ve already lost the baby weight!” can send her down a self-shaming spiral she doesn’t need. Really, you don’t need to say anything about her body or appearance. Please, just don’t.
Support her change, connect with her
The next time you see a new mom, take time to connect with her and ask her how she’s doing. Ask her how she’s coping with the new changes in motherhood. Tell her she’s doing an amazing job. And if you’re really interested in supporting her, volunteer to do something that would be helpful for her, like bringing a meal or helping clean her house. (PSA – Don’t ask a new mom what she needs you to help with, because she likely doesn’t know. Just tell her what you’re going to do, or better yet — just do it. She’ll never forget your kindness).
Don’t compare them with their past appearance
Remember that mothers are more than their bodies. They have innate worth and value that goes beyond how they feed their babies or what their bodies look like.
Let’s lift them up as such – they deserve to be cherished. Motherhood is the most grateful task on this earth. Let’s celebrate them.
Right after the mother gives birth, her estrogen and progesterone levels drop dramatically, which can contribute to the “baby blues” (mood swings, anxiety, sadness or irritability, which resolve within a week or so of birth) or postpartum depression. Hence, it’s important we support her mentally and emotionally.
Fully recovering from pregnancy and childbirth can take months. While many women feel mostly recovered by 6-8 weeks, it may take longer than this to feel like yourself again. During this time, you may feel as though your body has turned against you. Try not to get frustrated.
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We sense that ‘normal’ isn’t coming back, that we are being born into a new normal: a new kind of society, a new relationship to the earth, a new experience of being human.